dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
Randomize
