Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
Randomize
