was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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