you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
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