he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
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