trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
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