Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
Randomize