Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
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