Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
no. you can't hotbox the world.
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
27 Of The Most NSFW Life Hacks
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
23 Disturbing Small-Town Horror Stories
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.