How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
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