there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
Can you repeat that, but with context?
Randomize
