we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
got in a fight at the bar because some dude thought i was being sarcastic when i told him "sweet mustache". it really was a sweet mustache
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
Randomize
