wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Randomize
