I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
i woke up with toilet paper straight tucked up in my underwear wearing a pizza sauce mustach. I dont think i got laid last night.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
Randomize
