I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
apparently the secret to your success is patron
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize
