I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
why is half of my head shaved?
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