I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
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