I could have mohawked her pubes.
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
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