Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Randomize