your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
How does it feel to date your dad?
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Randomize
