Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
Randomize
