When he brought me into his room he showed me his James Bond calendar and matching sheets, and then told me that his goal in life is to be James Bond….epic fail. Mission Impossible. I was scared to take off his boxers to find out that they were also James Bond themed.
RUN LIKE YOUR JAMES BOND
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
Randomize
