so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
I cut my penus on the lid.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
We don't watch enough power rangers
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
Randomize
