I seem to have left my pride at pride
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
Randomize