it was like fucking gandolphs beard
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
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