he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
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