There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
you inspire me to be a worse person
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
I forgot wine drunk hurts
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
