i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
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