I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
Randomize
