We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
So, someone in Olympia stole my credit card # last week and bought a platypus vibrator with it. That’s it.
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
Randomize