Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
