Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
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