if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
Note to self: the judgement that occurs when unrolling your last 5 which was used to snort drugs the night before, to pay for alcohol before noon on a Monday is worth just sucking it up and taking an overdraft fee.
Wait a min, you had drugs last night?!
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
Just woke up from a first date on the futon watching Arrested Development by myself, him cuddling another chick in his room. Simultaneously the best and worst one night stand in history.
Bonus: took me 2 hours to get home on the streetcar cause I spent my cab money on drinks for his friend last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
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