i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
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