please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
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