So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
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I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
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