His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
Randomize
