I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
Randomize
