Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
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I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
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Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
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