Apparently I ran up to the group of cookie-cutter blonde chicks and screamed "Delta Gamma Nuuuuuuu!" really excitedly and tried to hug them and share fake sorority stories with them.
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.