using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
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i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
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We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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