I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
I fear hooking up with people who have white pillowcases because my guyliner always smears on it and i either have to A. sneak out in the night or B. wash it and see them again
When I'm drunk and can't pee, I sing my abc's in my head and try to pee before I get to pee. Last night I forgot to do it in my head
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
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