you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
Randomize