atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize
