you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.