Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
hell yes lets make some ravioli
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
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