Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
Randomize
