Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
Randomize
