definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Randomize
