guess who was drunk and crawling in the middle of the road and got brought home by the police last night? HINT: ME
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
Randomize
