you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
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